Top Ten With Stu and Ben: Ep 6
- bcporter
- Oct 30, 2022
- 2 min read
Every week they face a new topic. Some are foreign, while some hit very close to home. No matter the subject, Ben and Stu will strip an issue down to its bare essentials, and from that they form what they believe to be the perfect top ten list. They argue. They fight. But ultimately, they have to compromise in pursuit of the rankings.
For their seventh episode, Stu and Ben work to settle the age-old debate of which animals are the best. Each has their own measurements for what makes one animal better than another, and while they might not be exactly the same, they do reflect many of the same ideas. When determining where an animal ranks on the list, Ben puts a major emphasis on how much he wants to hug the creature. Stuart’s approach differs from Ben’s hug-ability scale as he takes into account cuteness, coolness, and capacity for destruction. Stuart now refers to this system of ranking as the “3 C’s of Critter Criterion.” How they decided on their picks may have been different, but regardless their reasoning was always there.
Episode seven saw the return of the “First, the worst” segment where Stu and Ben share their grievances with their least favorite animals. Things went beyond simple facts as Ben gave personal testimony of why he despises deer. It was a moment of vulnerability for the typically reserved host.
As for the list, things went as they always do. Agreement followed often immediately by disagreement, then rinse and repeat. Both parties pleaded their cases as for why they chose what they did. It all boiled down to the top pick which was delivered by Ben this week. With so much on the line, you can be assured that things got contentious.
The list played out as follows:
1. Monkeys (Picked by Ben)
2. Hippos (Picked by Stu)
3. Dogs (Picked by Ben)
4. Penguins (Picked by Stu)
5. Cows (Picked by Ben)
6. Goats (Picked by Stu)
7. Orcas (Picked by Ben)
8. Polar bears (Picked by Stu)
9. Tigers (Picked by Ben)
10. Ducks (Picked by Stu)
In this episode, Stu and Ben both learned a lot. Stu learned of Ben’s love for dogs despite having never owned one. Ben was taught about Pablo Escobar’s role in the Columbian hippo problem. Lengthy discussions about the genius of Orcas and the spectrum of goat ability were had. Stuart also pleaded his case on why ducks are the perfect embodiment of the phrase “Jack of all trades, master of none.”
Of the millions upon millions of animal species currently roaming the planet, only a select few can be considered the best, and only finest among those can crack the top ten. Stu and Ben sorted through the data so that others do not have to. Why waste precious time discerning how cool a polar bear is relative to a cow when Ben and Stu can do it for you? Make your life easier and listen to “Top Ten with Stu and Ben: Animals” to catch up on all the opinions you never knew you needed.
To listen to the full episode, click here

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